Bieber’s Back Baby

Anyone remember Britney Spears’ downfall of 2007? Those horrendous images of her shiny new haircut, or dare I say utter baldness? Not her finest moment to say the least. But she’s Britney bitch, and the bitch always comes back. 19 months later she stepped back into the spotlight with her release of her album “Circus”, and this Womanizer rose to the top again.

In today’s news, we have a similar survivor story. The young JBiebs had a rough falling out for the past two years and lost touch with his sound. To be honest though, everyone saw it coming. It was predicted that the minute his balls dropped, the boy wonder would lose his girlish pipes. The key in his first hit “One Time” is so high that even Julius Caesar can’t reach it after hitting a loud dab. But pre-puberty, Justin had a fabulous success story. With a little ego-boost from Usher, Justin swept the charts. He attracted fan girls from around the world while assuring every radio station that he was determined to “stay grounded”. Bullshit, Biebs. Foreshadowing at its finest, everyone.

An early sign of Justin’s downfall included discarding the beautiful Selena Gomez from his arm. And with that, there was one more lonely girl in the world. But really, Justin?! That girl is gorgeous. And talented. And wonderful. And I know this because we are such close friends. If anyone watched the 2014 AMA’s, you may remember Selena’s heart touching performance of “The Heart Wants What It Wants”, and the tears that followed at the end. WAKE UP JUSTIN. Selena put her heart on the table and yet, we still have seen no signs of reconciling. We pray not all hope is lost on this couple.

Selena aside, Justin flirted with the law a couple times as well. From scuffles with the paparazzi to almost being exiled from Argentina, this teen heartthrob disappointed 13 year olds around the globe. Rumor has it he applied for the A$AP gang and for everyone’s benefit, received a big fat rejection letter. While the number of tattoos on Justin’s body increased, his fan base began to decrease. But not only because of his arrests. His album titled “Journals” was the epitome of Justin’s ruination. Not only did the album lack proper marketing, but it also failed to please the ears of Justin’s listeners. The album does not contain one song that has a memorable or catchy line that is even worth quoting as an angsty Facebook status. And let us not forget the Roast of Justin Bieber. Just because you let people rip on you Justin does not promise popularity again.

But fear no more, because JBiebs is coming back. Actually, he’s already on his way back. What do you mean, you ask? My point exactly. If you’re still confused, which means you probably have cut all ties to pop culture, try looking up Justin’s new song on iTunes. Males all over campus are embarrassed to request this song to the DJ, but we all know they want to. Don’t worry guys, we support you Beliebers out there. Even JBiebs is surprised by his recent success, so much so that he was brought to tears at the end of his performance at this year’s VMA’s. But for all we know, he may have just gotten a little mascara in his eyes.

I hope we see more of this new side of Justin in the upcoming months. He is adding a little more spice to our Spotify playlists and even our pregames. To be honest, if Justin continues to follow the comeback steps of Britney Spears, we may have something to beliebe in after all.

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